Calm the Storm….

No one can begin to imagine the genuine fear I had in my heart, when I realized that Mutabaruka saw my film. Of course I was glad that he saw it. Of course I hoped that it would make an impression. Of course I hoped he would remember it and me. But I wanted to leave a good impression, have him remember me in a good way  and not just as the girl who tried to stir up controversy.  In the name of art and artistic freedom, I was firmly happy with what was done in regards to the film, but I did not want to offend anyone.

For anyone unsure of who Mutabaruka is, here is a brief up to date.

Mutabaruka (formerly Allan Hope) is a dub poet,  born in Rae Town, Kingston on 26th December, 1952.  After primary education he attended Kingston Technical High School, where he was a student for four years.  Trained in Electronics, he left his first job after about six months and took employment at the Jamaica Telephone Company Limited.   During his time at the Telephone Company he began to examine Rastafarianism and to find it more meaningful than either the Roman Catholicism of his upbringing or the political radicalism into which he had drifted….

The rest of  his bio can be read here.

Also, check out a brief interview with him on “No Reservations” with Anthony Bourdain. It starts at about the 8 minute mark.

Oral sex is a very touchy subject amongst many. It might be considered taboo even. Now, would ironic be the correct word to use as the description of me previewing my first film, which contains blatant fellatio, in front of a Jamaican audience? Things that make you go hmmmmmmmmmm. 🙂

‘Dinner’ (the name of the film) is about a young couple who get together and enjoy each other at the end of a stressful  work day. They cook, they eat, and they eat… (typed that last line smiling and humming, yuh eat, yah cook?’ by Lovindeer) 😀 The scene was tastefully done, (no pun intended or maybe, but whatever) and it was not gratuitously thrown in for effect. There was an honest lead up to it. It was a beautiful thing. How can my beautiful thing upset or offend anyone?  Why do so many Jamaican artists lyrically dispel their disdain for orally pleasuring their woman?  The songs that immediately come to mind are the ones by Beenie Man

“Gun shot inna di air, no gyal eva sit inna  yuh face like chair….”

“No gyal cyarn siddung pan me head…”


“Bow Cyat dress back”

Busy Signal

“You no day pan no menu, me not nyaming you…”

and there are countless others. Dee-Jays verbally spar with one another using words that describe doers of the deed with insults, only to be praised by a crowd of men, who ceremoniously and loudly respond in favour of ‘fiyah pan di man and dem who nyam’, while their girls look at them incredulously, whilst singing to themselves..

“Alot a man nar get no pum pum tonight”…  because of the blatant lies.

Aaahhh, the mob mentality of a sound clash, what’s not to love?

Though there is some speculation that it might be false, there may be a beacon beyond the sea of protesters, in  Vybez Kartel. ‘Come ya nuh mi gyal’ is a song in Kartel’s voice that basically praises oral sex and we know in the  Dancehall world, that that is not only a no no, but a f^*k no! People are shocked, though I have no idea why anybody is shocked by anything Vybez Kartel does. ‘Dis man hab gonads’. Vybez has since denied that he recorded such a song, saying it was spliced and edited that way and that he was being set up, but I think he should just own it. lol 😀 Of course I’m just being selfish, ’cause  I want people to be openly on my side of the fence.

You be the judge. Splice and Dice…or a man with spice.. 😀

Men are funny creatures. They are ironic, contradictory and melodramatic at times.  Now I neither advocate nor do I condemn such practice. This is all up to the individuals involved. My peeve however, are the guys who are blatantly outspoken about it and deny like Judas that they’ve ever done it or even want to do it, when not only do they participate in the act, but instigate it. I am in no way saying that every guy who denies giving a girl oral sex is lying, but a shit load of them are and I don’t see the reason for it. If you do it within the constraints of a committed relationship, everybody else and their opinion can just piss off a cliff.  

Oral sex, any kind a sex for that matter, should be engaged in cautiously. Not because he’s handsome or she’s pretty, means you can  your dive right on in with reckless abandon, be it with your face or your very special friend. If you have no intention of doing it, fine. Just be straight up from the beginning. Funny thing about oral sex though, a lot of the people who protest about giving it, have absolutely no qualms about getting it. If a fiyah a fiyah. It shouldn’t just be a problem on one end. Remember the corny quote from the ‘Legend of Bille Jean’?

“Fair is Fair” 😀

There I was in Jamaica, where fair didn’t mean shit. lol I felt queasy and unstable. I had heard rumblings about Muta talking about it on his late night talk show, “The Cutting Edge’. I did not hear it for myself though. Now my sistren from another mother, Sabriya knows this man personally. After I mentioned to her my fear and how intimidated I was after I had made eye contact with him at the festival, she tried to comfort me. Sabriya if you’re reading this, it didn’t work. 😀 lol I felt like this.

She told me that I should just be cool. and that Muta’s wife Jacqui saw it, and she loved it. Who can calm the storm but the man’s wife? I felt hope.  Jacqui is quite a character in her own right and very much the lion’s match. Toya and I were invited through Sabriaya, to Jacqui and Muta’s home and it was a helluva experience from the time we walked in, to the time we left. Jacqui is a flamboyant and outspoken woman with a natural flair for the arts. It is easy to see why she is Muta’s partner. She is  the designer behind MUTAMBA DESIGNS and has been a fixture in the fashion industry for years. Her designs are sexy,earthy and ethnic inspired but still very modern and chic. To see some more of MUTAMBA DESIGNS, check

While we were at the house, Jacqui invited us to do some shopping, which is the way I believe my shopping experience should be every time. Relaxed, chillin’ on the bed, cool breeze blowing in from the garden, easy listening on the radio. Three girls going through designer clothes with the designer right there. This entire time I was feeling good, but there was a little nag in the back of my brain, because Muta was in the next room. Jacqui reassured me not to be scared, and I went about my shopping. Buying shit that one cannot afford, sure can make a girl feel good. 😀 I felt calm.

After all of the chatting, laughing and shopping, it was time to meet the man. I felt the queasiness coming back. I took light small steps on the hardwood out the bedroom down the hall and humbled up myself for the encounter. I had no idea if he would say Fiyah! ..but he smiled very warmly. I formally introduced myself while he stood in his kitchen cooking and then he said,..

“The only thing I have to say about your film is that it is too short. I needed more.”

I couldda kissed him. I had been stewing in fear for absolutely no reason. We said our goodbyes, his big iron gate closed behind us and I left his home on cloud nine.

Back in our hotel room, I felt content and for one brief moment I wished that Toya would turn into my husband, ’cause I wanted some dinner…;-D  It had been an extraordinary day.


About bak2moi

I am a woman trying to balance motherhood and womanhood, while pursuing her dreams. Hopefully I get to keep at least foot on the ground during the process.
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One Response to Calm the Storm….

  1. Linisa says:

    Tap u chupitness, you have the great Muta asking for more???????? …*speaks in horrible Jamaican accent* ” My gurlllllllll uno a leaddddddddd!!!!!!!! Fiyahhhhhhhhhh!!!!” ha ha ha ha ha ha ………….. Anyway I’ve been asked to ask you when you going premiere the film in Antigua …………… tell me when u ready to plan 🙂 xoxoxoxoxoxo

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